{Notes on The Violet}

When I found out I was pregnant I already knew what my child's name would be. It just so happened that I'm having a little girl {yay!} and so she will be named Violet.

Violet Brown was my great-grandmother, my mother's father's mother. I have no picture of her unfortunately, but I so like the idea of using family names. {Eisley shares her great-grandmother's middle name, and if I had a boy, he would be named after a family surname - Paxton.}
As it turns out, and I didn't know this when I picked the name - I swear, Violet is due in February which just so happens to have the violet as a birth flower! What's more - the birth stone for February is the amethyst - a violet colored gem. I had no idea, but I'm so glad it suits. Now she just better not be born early in January because that will ruin everything... ;-)
And when you see antique postcards with Valentine's Day themes - a February holiday, no less - they quite often feature violets on them. Which is perfect. I'm happy to call my little V-Pie "A Token of Love"... hehe...
Just as Violet is an old fashioned name, they were very popular on postcards back in the day, and I might just have to figure out a way to incorporate one of these in her birth announcement. Again, it suits, because everyone knows how much I love old things.
But right now Violet is still a squirmy thing in my stomach, I only have seen fuzzy black & white images of her. She has kicked me a few times, Eisley has kicked her a few times...

She is as long as an ear of corn, and I just hit 24 weeks, which means if she was born now she'd have a 50% chance of surviving. It's neat to hit that "point of viability" but, still, February baby! February!

Baby Envy

It is a good thing Pie² is in the oven, I'm telling you. Eisley keeps rubbing it in my face that she is not a baby anymore.

Today I was in my towel robe, post shower, putting on makeup - I heard a rattling noise coming from Eisley's room where she was playing. I immediately stopped applying mascara and went to check on her.

She was in her crib, rattling the side rails and looking very proud of herself. Most certainly because I didn't put her there, she had apparently climbed in by herself.

A little bit later she runs up to me, hands me her bottle, gets a firm grasp on my finger and pulls me to the kitchen. This is her newest trick, to pull mom or dad towards what she wants. She points to the sink. She wants me to wash and refill her empty bottle. I think, what happened to the days when she simply cried, and we had to guess if it was food/comfort/change that she needed? Now she tells me, in her own adorable way, exactly what she wants.

So I fill her bottle, taking my payment via a long, smoochy kiss on her cheek {which is less puffy than ever, might I add, as she is turning into a child and losing her baby fat} and then she's off once again.

She scampers down the hallway to her bedroom, points to her crib and says "nite-nite". Is my almost two year old telling me she's ready for her nap? But first, we direct mommy to close the blinds, of course.

And so now she is napping, and now that I have a moment of peace to think about it, I'm feeling more grateful than ever that Pie² is coming soon.

I'm so proud of Eisley & her toddlerhood achievements, but it is so bittersweet to see the infant fading. She needs me a little less each day. And this is a good thing, but I won't say I don't miss her being a helpless newborn. Of course I do.

These days she climbs in and out of the car by herself, sings along to songs she hears, yells at the dogs when they bark, and sometimes can even get her clothes on without help. She used to sleep soundly in her car seat through a grocery trip, now she insists on riding in the cars attached to the carts, and has a conniption fit if we pass the free cookies without stopping to get her one. At night she holds her baby doll up to us, so that we can kiss the baby and put her to bed as well, each time making me think, "This isn't my baby, Eisley, you're my baby. I want to rock you to sleep."

I marvel at Eisley but I also can't wait to have another little baby to snuggle and marvel at. In fact this was a big motivating fact when we decided to try for Pie², with Eisley growing more independent each day, I was growing severely jealous of other moms with new babies, and more impatient to have one of my own.

Even though Pie² will undoubtedly grow up on me, too.

But I'm not done being a mother to infants yet.

{Little Baby}

{The pregnancy test I was given at the doctor - hugely positive, yay!}

{Dear Little Baby #2 - Whoever you are...}

I love you.

Up until now this blog & my life as a mother has been mostly all about Eisley. But now you are on your way as well, another sweet blessing in my life among all the others.

It is still hard at this point to imagine loving another being as much as I love Eisley, but I know they say it is possible, and I know I will. Heck, already do. Don't ever forget it. Your momma loved you since the day she saw that faint pink line.

You & I have something in common {other than DNA} in that we both have a big sister. Another thing in common is that we both have really wonderful, amazing big sisters. How lucky are we?

Eisley is sometimes lonely and bored for a playmate and I know she will benefit so much from having you in her life.

Little Baby #2, you were planned and you were so wanted. I feel incredibly blessed to have conceived two "first try" babies. I have known of too many deserving women who did not experience this "luxury" and so I do not take that fact for granted. And so I thank God for your existence and His plan for your life. Even if you are making me sick and exhausted. And overly-sentimental. Blame the hormones. They make me cry at every little thing...

On the day I found out you existed I thought to myself, "God has smiled on me today!" I was just so excited and grateful.

You are like a smile from God in my eyes.

{Love, Mom}